World's Greatest Grandpa

5x2 - Episode Two

2008-03-14T14:13:00.003-04:00

This week Mike and I take a look at 10 songs from a variety of soundtracks. We were joined by Mike's roommate Danny during the second half of the show who kicked it up to 5x3. Enjoy the 5X2 podcast, soundtrack style.

Playlist
1) Wig in a Box - Polyphonic Spree from Hedwig and the Angry Inch
2) Dark Days Theme Spoken Word - DJ Shadow from Dark Days
3) Storytelling - Belle and Sebastian from Storytelling
4) De Usuahia a la Quiaca - Gustavo Santaolalla from The Motorcycle Diaries
5) Don’t Make Me a Target - Spoon from Stranger Than Fiction
6) Higher and Higher - Craig Wedren and Theodore Shapiro from Wet Hot American Summer
7) Don’t Look Down - The Sugarplastic from The Powerpuff Girls
8) The Goonies are Good Enough - Cyndi Lauper from The Goonies
9) There Goes My Baby - The Walkmen from Stubbs The Zombie
10) Everybody’s Gotta Learn Sometime - Beck from Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

5x2 Episode One

2008-03-05T18:36:00.006-05:00

Howdy! A friend of mine, Mike Doig and I are doing a podcast, a weekly recording of our favorite 10 songs of the week. Each of us gets to play 5 songs, hence 5X2.

Playlist
1. The Poets of Rythm - Smilin’ (While You’re Crying)
2. Darius Rucker - Tendercrisp Bacon Cheddar Ranch
3. Ima Robot - Here Come the Bombs
4. The Kinks - Care of Cell 44
5. Ropeladder 12 - Dreaming (of Tranquility)
6. Ponies in the Surf - Ventricle
7. Fat Jon and the Ample Soul Physician - I and the Queen
8. Islands - Rough Gem
9. Imi - Strap
10. Abba - Take a Chance on Me

This will be on iTunes shortly, so you can subscribe and get it every Tuesday!

Liveblogging the Oscars

2008-02-24T21:14:00.002-05:00

I will now be live blogging the Oscars. Please check back often and refresh.

7:53 EST - The Oscars have not yet begun.

11:52 EST - The cable went out. What happened?! GODDAMMIT.

My weekend.

2008-01-22T11:28:00.001-05:00

I went to a bunch of fun stuff this weekend!

Friday - The Greg Johnson/Larry Murphy Show at Rififi
- Saw Demetri Martin, Patrick Borelli and others. At the bar I had a conversation with Bobby Tisdale who gave me some tips on starting out in comedy, was super nice and invited me to play bingo on Sunday.

Sunday - Bingo Bobby and the O-69s
- Played Bingo at the Black Rabbit bar in Greenpoint. Bobby Tisdale called the games, performed some chants here and there (Example: When it was time to check the person's card his chant was: "Check check, checkcheckcheck, checkitycheckitycheckcheckcheck..." Most were more clever than that.)

Monday - UCB Sketch Show (iBadger and The President) - Human Giant
- Pretty good sketch show, included an Emmy award winning writer for 30 Rock.
- Saw Aziz Ansari, personal hero Leo Allen, and Rob Riggle. Kristen Shaal of Flight of the Conchords handed me a snack cake in honor of Martin Luther King Jr. and Rob Heubel said that I look like a guy who would ride a recumbant bicycle.

Tuesday - BACK TO WORK.

2007-10-26T08:47:00.001-04:00

I can assure you that I have not died. A massive update will follow, two months from now.

2007-08-22T22:08:00.000-04:00

Today I had my first exciting celebrity sighting since moving to NYC. In front of the Virgin Megastore on 14th St. was:

That is Mr. Kanye West looking at me.

NOT PICTURED: His body guard, police officer, large group of people staring at him.

Somebody Made a Mistake on the Internet

2007-08-02T23:31:00.000-04:00

Found here. PS. The movie is good.

A REQUEST OF MY FRIENDS

2007-07-24T22:39:00.000-04:00

This Sunday, the 29th, my lovely girlfriend Maureen and I are moving from Rochester to Greenpoint, Brooklyn. If you live in NYC, or will be in the area, boy oh boy could we use the help. If you would be willing to lend a hand, no matter how small, send me an email or leave a comment: ramsey(dot)ess(at)gmail(dot)com

Here is what I can offer:

1. Pizza (there's a really good place ten minutes away)

2. Beer (if you're the first to respond to this offer, I will even give you the opportunity to suggest the brand, assuming I can get it)

3. Anything you want. Seriously. I hate moving and I'll be your slave for a day or something if you help.

Thanks for reading. If you can help, that email again is: ramsey(dot)ess(at)gmail(dot)com and I'll email you the specifics.

I love you,

Ramsey

KIND OF HARD TO READ

2007-07-23T19:46:00.000-04:00

2007-07-17T19:26:00.000-04:00

I've been in New York teaching for a week now. Here are my top two favorite things I've seen so far.

2. A sign for an apartment complex called "King Apartments" named after Martin Luther King Jr. On the sign you can see King in front of a few buildings, with a very shocked expression on his face. The expression looks like somebody went "Hey! Martin!" and then he turned around and they took a picture. AND THEN SOMEBODY DREW IT.

1. In Union Square there was a very old man playing a very loud electronic keyboard. The keyboard was playing the electronic trumpet noise, which if you can't imagine, is very annoying, and really doesn't sound like a trumpet. In front of him was a carpet and at least five dolls that dance to the music. In front of the carpet and dolls was a surprisingly large crowd for a guy who wants spare change.

Around the corner was a man sitting on a chair with an acoustic guitar and an expression on his face that was equal parts sad and irritated, just watching.

I HEART EN WHY!

2007-06-28T12:18:00.000-04:00

SAD COMPUTER

2007-03-27T13:12:00.000-04:00

Either my iTunes "Party Shuffle" is depressed or it thinks I am and is trying to make fun of me.

2007-03-17T22:44:00.000-04:00

Starting My Next Aborted Project

2007-03-06T00:00:00.000-05:00

Seventy-Nine Essays About the Moon
1. The moon is big. Way back when, people used to look at the moon and think to themselves: "One day. One day we'll walk on that. Then they'll be sorry."

References

M. Braukus, B. Dickey, K. Humphries (December 4, 2006). NASA Unveils Global Exploration Strategy and Lunar Architecture. NASA. Retrieved on 2006-08-10.
Alexander, M. E. (1973). "The Weak Friction Approximation and Tidal Evolution in Close Binary Systems". Astrophysics and Space Science 23: 459–508.
J. J. Gillis, P. D. Spudis (1996). "The Composition and Geologic Setting of Lunar Far Side Maria". Lunar and Planetary Science 27: 413–404.
Charles Shearer and 15 coauthors (2006). "Thermal and magmatic evolution of the Moon". Reviews in Mineralogy and Geochemistry 60: 365-518.
G. Jeffrey Taylor (August 31, 2000). A New Moon for the Twenty-First Century.
Lionel Wilson James W. Head (2003). "Lunar Gruithuisen and Mairan domes: Rheology and mode of emplacement". Journal of Geophysical Research 108.
Lunar Orbiter: Impact Basin Geology (English). Lunar and Planetary Institute (October 3, 2000). Retrieved on 2006-12-24.
Linda, Martel (June 4, 2003). The Moon's Dark, Icy Poles.
H. J. Melosh (1989). Impact cratering: A geologic process. Oxford Univ. Press.
G. Jeffrey Taylor (1998). The biggest hole in the Solar System.
G. Heiken, D. Vaniman, and B. French (editors) (1991). Lunar Sourcebook, a user's guide to the Moon. Cambridge University Press, New York, 736 pp.
K. L. Rasmussen, P. H. Warren (1985). "Megaregolith thickness, heat flow, and the bulk composition of the moon". Nature 313: 121-124.
Lunar Polar Composites (GIF). Retrieved on 2006-03-20.
Eureka! Ice found at lunar poles (August 31, 2001).
Paul Spudis (2006). Ice on the Moon.
P. Lucey and 12 coauthors (2006). "Understanding the lunar surface and space-Moon interactions". Reviews in Mineralogy and Geochemistry 60: 83-219.
Mark Wieczorek and 15 coauthors (2006). "The constitution and structure of the lunar interior". Reviews in Mineralogy and Geochemistry 60: 221-364.
J. G. Williams, S. G. Turyshev, D. H. Boggs, J. T. Ratcliff (2006). "Lunar laser ranging science: Gravitational physics and lunar interior and geodesy". Advances in Space Research 37 (1): 67-71.
A. Konopliv, S. Asmar, E. Carranza, W. Sjogren, and D. Yuan (2001). "Recent gravity models as a result of the Lunar Prospector mission". Icarus 50: 1-18.
Hood, L. L., and Z. Huang (1991). "Formation of magnetic anomalies antipodal to lunar impact basins: Two-dimensional model calculations". J. Geophys. Res. 96: 9837-9846.
S. Lawson, W. Feldman, D. Lawrence, K. Moore, R. Elphic, and R. Belian (2005). "Recent outgassing from the lunar surface: the Lunar Prospector alpha particle spectrometer". J. Geophys. Res. 110: doi:10.1029/2005JE002433.
S. Alan Stern (1999). "The Lunar atmosphere: History, status, current problems, and context". Rev. Geophys. 37: 453-491.
Binder, A. B. (1974). "On the origin of the moon by rotational fission". The Moon 11 (2): 53-76.
Mitler, H. E. (1975). "Formation of an iron-poor moon by partial capture, or: Yet another exotic theory of lunar origin". Icarus 24: 256-268.
Stevenson, D. J. (1987). "Origin of the moon - The collision hypothesis". Annual review of earth and planetary sciences 15: 271-315.
R. Canup and E. Asphaug (2001). "Origin of the Moon in a giant impact near the end of the Earth's formation". Nature 412: 708-712.

CLICK TO BE BIGGER!

2007-02-06T21:42:00.000-05:00

A HOLIDAY PROJECT

2006-12-15T13:35:00.000-05:00

A fun holiday project is coming! Here's a preview!

Christmas mustache!

Happy Holidays from Me and Mo

2006-12-12T23:29:00.000-05:00

Hey there. I tried to get everybody an email to this, but I could've easily forgotten someone, and in that case, I am very sorry.

Happy Holidays!

UPDATE

2006-12-09T17:54:00.000-05:00

Hey y'all.

I put up a new Beatnik Squad and redesigned everything.

I'm putting the finishing touches on an exciting Christmas card from Mo and I. Get ready for it super soon! (It's like 98% done, so maybe tonight.)

BIRTHDAY!

2006-10-14T17:36:00.000-04:00

WORK!

2006-09-26T21:33:00.000-04:00

TEXT!

2006-09-06T17:09:00.000-04:00

Hi there everybody.
Unfortunately, things have been pretty busy so I don't have time to draw this particular entry. I almost did one this weekend, but then I decided that I should be reading and couldn't justify it. Here is what it would look like, though.

In this panel we see me walking around the Brockport campus. CAPTION: I started grad school.

In this panel we see me reading. There is a large stack of books next to me. CAPTION: It is hard work.

CAPTION: I have yet to hit it off with the rest of the students though. We see a student walking by me who says: "Nice purple shirt, faggot!" I say: "It's burgundy, idiot!"

I also went to see the Flaming Lips over the weekend, but that didn't really fit in the strip.

In summary: I miss Geneseo, I miss you, the person who is reading this, but I am keeping busy, and I'm mostly enjoying the school. This is going to be one hectic year, though.

EDIT: My buddy Chris Donahue made this:

COHABITATION!

2006-08-27T02:52:00.000-04:00

GOOD BYE MUSIC!

2006-08-06T15:27:00.000-04:00

WHOOPS!

2006-08-01T20:56:00.000-04:00

WHAT I DID OVER THE WEEKEND.

2006-07-18T20:36:00.000-04:00

UPDATES!

2006-06-30T01:28:00.000-04:00

FREELANCE CARTOONIST!

2006-06-12T15:19:00.000-04:00

CAR!

2006-06-02T00:52:00.000-04:00

PHONE CALL FROM PERSONAL HERO!

2006-05-27T21:04:00.000-04:00

Click for a link the the entry in animation-vision!

(Also, if it's no trouble, leave a comment when you see this. I just want to make sure somebody besides me still reads this, as I still put a lot of work into it.)

GRADUATION!

2006-05-24T22:55:00.000-04:00

New Beatnik Squad

2006-05-18T22:01:00.000-04:00

I just drew a new Beatnik Squad strip.

Here

With that done, that means I can make a new blog entry with a clean conscience.

FINAL!

2006-05-09T17:33:00.000-04:00

SWING! ROCK TO THE DOME!

2006-04-24T13:19:00.000-04:00

HIGH CLASS!

2006-04-22T21:37:00.000-04:00

BLOG!

2006-04-10T20:25:00.000-04:00

CATCHING UP!

2006-04-09T22:24:00.000-04:00

I made a new entry, but Blogger won't let me upload new images.

I'll do it tomorrow.

DINNER PARTY!

2006-03-26T22:46:00.000-05:00

JIG!

2006-03-17T13:32:00.000-05:00

DEALERSHIP!

2006-03-15T22:26:00.000-05:00

RUSSELL!

2006-03-09T19:07:00.000-05:00

Russell's blog is here.

TED LEO!

2006-03-07T12:10:00.000-05:00

PUNS! CANADA! BELLE AND SEBASTIAN!

2006-03-02T20:52:00.000-05:00

PEDOMETER!

2006-02-23T20:35:00.000-05:00

GRAD APPS!

2006-02-16T14:24:00.000-05:00

COUCH!

2006-02-12T23:30:00.000-05:00

Click for the big version.

Groceries!

2006-02-09T20:23:00.000-05:00

Click for readable version.

Mo is hard to draw at that angle.

Art Blog

2006-02-07T15:53:00.000-05:00

Hey, let's try something new. Art Blog. Inspired by Dorthy Gambrell's Donation Derby, let's see how long I keep this up (Prediction: 3 entries).

That was pretty great, huh? And it was the most action I've had in the day as of writing. Tomorrow: GROCERIES!

Happy-Go-Puppy

2006-02-06T16:43:00.000-05:00

Mo and I started a band. We had our first performance on Friday. We played three songs, all three of which were about being in love with each other (One by Ben Gibbard, one by my lady Feist, and one by Sixpense None the Richer (guess which one)). The name of our band?

Happy-Go-Puppy

Yeah, that's right. Do you want a shirt with that name on it? Maybe a pin? Have I got a link for you, then.

Salvation Army

2006-01-22T15:09:00.000-05:00

This outfit was less than nine dollars. Notice the crest on the jacket. That hat is a Stetson. Yes.

In which I coin a pun.

2006-01-12T09:04:00.000-05:00

News!
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt (or Brangelina Jolitt as the press hath dubbed them) are havin' a baby that's not adopted! I wouldn't ordinarily care, but I have coined the perfect headline for it and I need to claim it as my own before I read it everywhere:

WOMB RAIDER

If you see that on the cover of The Sun or Gawker or anything like that, know that they had to pay me ten dollars per use.

Continued

2006-01-10T15:01:00.000-05:00

As a sequel to this post:

My three current magazine subscriptions are as follows:

1. The New Yorker
2. The Harvard Lampoon
3. The Believer

Good goodness.

Pepsi Holiday Spice

2006-01-03T18:42:00.000-05:00

John Dechant got me eight cans of this, the greatest drink in the history of man, for our apartment's Secret Santa. I will be drinking it on special occasions only, and sharing it with no one, except with my first child, as I drink the can on the day that he or she is born.

"Celebrate the season with family, friends and new Pepsi Holiday Spice. It's a festive blend of holiday spices and great tasting Pepsi. But it's only around through the season, so this is one gift you'll want to open early. And often!"

Interesting FactT

2005-12-26T03:11:00.000-05:00

I listen to more music in Warsaw than other places, apparently.

According to iTunes, I have listened to 707 songs (as of writing) in the past two weeks. 541 of those songs have been heard since I got home on the 19th.

That's 77.2857143 songs a day!
At an average length of 3 minutes, that's 231.857143 minutes (3.864 hours) of solid music.

Afterword.

2005-12-24T14:41:00.000-05:00

And now I have a cold. Thanks a lot, Santa.

Home!

2005-12-23T23:47:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm back home, done with student teaching. Already boredom has set in. On the plus side: I will be spending New Year's with my girlfriend Mo. You are all very excited for me, I'm sure.

Christmas Eve is coming tomorrow, and this is probably the year that I have been the least excited for it. There are a variety of reason for this, but I feel stupid because I keep falling into these college kid traps: last Thanksgiving I was complaining because most of my friends live away from where I do, before that I was lamenting how home doesn't feel so homey, and now I'm doing the standard "grasping for what Christmas used to be."

New Year's Resolution: don't blog when home on break.

Everybody do yourself multiple favors and get your hands on anything by Erlend Øye.

More...

2005-12-20T23:31:00.000-05:00

Hey, I put pictures on flickr. Check them out.

Ramsey Does More Top Ten Lists

2005-12-20T23:13:00.000-05:00

Best 5 Books that I Purchased and Read That Came Out in 2005 by Ramsey G. Ess
1. Encyclopedia of an Ordinary Life by Amy Krause Rosenthal
2. The Areas of My Expertise by John Hodgman
3. Assassination Vacation by Sarah Vowell
4. The Complete New Yorker: Eighty Years of the Nation's Greatest Magazine
5. The Intimate World of Abraham Lincoln by C.A.Tripp

Holiday

2005-12-09T16:48:00.000-05:00

Ramsey Quantifies the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand and Five

2005-12-04T15:05:00.000-05:00

Part One in a Many-Part Series! Collect them all!

Best Albums of 2005 by Ramsey G. Ess
1. Of Montreal – Sunlandic Twins
2. The Decemberists – Picaresque
3. Sufjan Stevens – Illinois
4. P:Ano – Brigadoon
5. Stars – Set Yourself on Fire
6. White Stripes – Get Behind Me Satan
7. Architecture in Helsinki – In Case We Die
8. Broken Social Scene – Broken Social Scene
9. The New Pornographers – Twin Cinema
10. M.I.A. – Arular

Break.

2005-11-25T22:48:00.000-05:00

Home is boring when most of your friends have moved away.

A dialogue.

2005-11-14T17:48:00.000-05:00

Me: I have been eating the same thing for dinner the past three nights in a row.
You: Why?
Me: Doggie bag. My parents took Mo and I out to dinner on Saturday and I have been eating the incredibly large portion of chicken parmesan every night since.
You: Isn't that kind of gross?
Me: We have a fridge. Food goes in there, then it goes in the microwave, then it goes in my tummy, via the mouth.
You: Why did you feel the need to blog about that?
Me: Why don't you shut your mouth?

Also, Arrested Development, the greatest TV show of all time, was cancelled, and it's probably your fault. You should watch the last five episodes, Mondays, starting December 5th.

2005-11-05T18:06:00.000-05:00

What?

Liberality for All!

2005-11-02T20:57:00.000-05:00

"America’s future has become an Orwellian nightmare of ultra-liberalism. Beginning with the Gore Presidency, the government has become increasingly dominated by liberal extremists.

In 2004, Muslim terrorists stopped viewing the weakened American government as a threat; instead they set their sights on their true enemies, vocal American conservatives. On one dark day, in 2006, many conservative voices were forever silenced by terrorist assassins. Those which survived joined forces and formed a powerful covert conservative organization called “The Freedom of Information League”, aka F.O.I.L."

One-eyed underground radio host Sean Hannity shoots lasers out of his bionic arm. It is not satire. It is a neo-con comic book, or neo-comic book, as I call them.

Good Lord.

Ironical.

2005-11-01T21:56:00.000-05:00

BBC News Link

Hallowe'en!

2005-10-30T15:44:00.000-05:00

Mo and I dressed up for Halloween. She took the pictures, so I will direct you to her blog to see them. I went as Artie, the strongest man in the world, and she went as Mia Wallace from Pulp Fiction.

Pictures over here.

Why I hate George Lucas.

2005-10-29T17:44:00.000-04:00

This is an actual easter egg from the new Star Wars DVD: http://www.gorillamask.net/yodadance.shtml

OniLink02 (5:43:48 PM): Pretty fucking dumb.
RamsoBOT (5:44:03 PM): Well put, brother of mine.

Beatnik Update

2005-10-26T22:28:00.000-04:00

I had two days off from student teaching so I made a new Beatnik Squad. It's over here.

Background information here and here.

Sandwich

2005-10-23T21:32:00.000-04:00

This weekend, I went to Buffalo to celebrate Tom's birthday. This afternoon we stopped for lunch at a lovely little restaurant that was soaked in almost as much grease as the food we consumed. Having never tried a reuben sandwich, I decided that I would try one here. After waiting about two to three hours for the food to arrive I took a bite out of my sandwich to find that the restaurant had not served me the sandwich made famous by Reuben Kulakofsky, but instead, they served me the Ramsey sandwich.

The Ramsey sandwich recipe is very similar to the Reuben, but a little bit cheaper and quicker to prepare.

Ingredients: drained sauerkraut, chopped sweet onion, chopped parsley, creamy Thousand Island dressing, submarine sandwich bread

combine the sauerkraut, onion, and parsley
spread Thousand Island dressing on sub roll
pile sauerkraut mixture on one slice
add second slice of bread
grill in butter

You'll notice that the sandwich has one key ingredient missing from the Reuben: corn beef.

I wasn't in the mood for a Ramsey sandwich of sourkraut and salad dressing so I sent it back for the addition of meat. It still was not very good, but I blame the restaurant.

The Rundown

2005-10-19T07:17:00.000-04:00

Since my last post, I have done a lot of student teaching, taken the GRE, done well on the GRE, taken two education certification exams, purchased a computer, had the computer shipped to the wrong address, retrieved the computer, created a teaching portfolio, had my paperwork, teaching ability, and said portfolio evaluated by my college, worked, worked, worked, enjoyed the Colbert Report greatly, and as I do everyday from 7:30AM-9:15AM, watched the movie Phenomenon, starring John Travolta.

Here's a picture of me with my new computer that I love:

Stress.

2005-10-10T00:22:00.000-04:00

Oh, so I had a birthday on the fifth. Turned 21. Pretty cool.

This week has been pretty stressful. My cooperating teacher where I student teach got sick and was out for two days. I didn't really have a lesson plan for either of these days and didn't have a substitute for one of them. Then on my birthday I had to face open house all alone, turning my work day into a sixteen hour one. Stress.

This weekend has been filled with GRE preparations. That's on Thursday. Then on the Saturday following I have two of my teacher certification tests. My teacher, will again not be in class on Tuesday. I think next week is my solo week of teaching. Stress.

Anniversary.

2005-10-01T14:21:00.000-04:00

Today is Maureen and my six-month anniversary. For those of you that need proof that this girl knows me amazinging well, this is what she gave me:

The plaque reads: "My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings: Look on my work, ye mighty, and dispair!"

Perfect.

Sometimes Music is Good.

2005-09-28T18:17:00.000-04:00

I was listening to a song I hadn't heard before when all of a sudden the end turned into feedback. I have no problem with this.

When the feedback persisted I glanced over at iTunes. There was still 3:09 left in the song.

Thanks a lot, Yo La Tengo.

Update.

2005-09-25T14:45:00.000-04:00

So, it's been a good while since I've updated the blog with anything of substance. I am presently student teaching, and it's going pretty well. I'm hesitant to say where I'm actually working or give any specific details or anything, lest one of my students figure out my first name (because I have such a common last name...) and track me down here and read the debauchary I have lived to blog about. (Staying up late to watch Star Wars!!!)

I'm happy with how everything is going, though. Things are well in Ramseyland. I'm going to be 21 in... ten days. However, that's a school night, so the aforementioned debauchary must be kept to a minimum.

Thanks for reading friends and family. I'll be sure to check in much more often.

TOM.

2005-09-16T17:05:00.000-04:00

mango-games.com

How I Spent My Weekend.

2005-09-12T16:15:00.000-04:00

I went to an Of Montreal concert in Buffalo this weekend with Mo, Vince and Tom and others on Saturday. It was very good. I purchased this:

I suddenly realized that I should've waited until the show was over to buy it as I would have to carry the record around for the rest of the evening. During the opening act it came to me that somebody from the band would probably be manning the merch table.

Kevin Barnes, the leader of the band, was there, and politely signed my record. First he asked for my name, and wrote it, "Ramsey." He then wrote "(Patrick)" before it, followed by "Nei!!!" Then he signed it. I'm not sure what it all means. (Patrick Ramsey is a quarterback from the Washington Redskins. I still don't know what Nei means.)

Here is the record as signed by Kevin, Dotti Alexander and James Huggins, giving me a total of three-fifths of the band. Hooray for weekends!

Turning Tables Round in Mark's & Spencer's

2005-09-01T12:35:00.000-04:00

You know what I miss? Internet. And TV.

But, I'm making due. I check my email regularly, and there are only three shows I watch religiously (Stella, The Daily Show, and Arrested Development), and they are finished, repeats or the new season hasn't begun yet, respectively. Most of the websites I frequent have slowed down in posting, in order to allow me to catch up.

I'm excited and nervous for student teaching to start. My first placement is in Mt. Morris Jr. High, beginning on Tuesday. Unfortunately, every person that knows something about the school reacts in the same way when I tell them: they grit their teeth as if to say "Eeech.... Good luck..." Turns out the school is impoverished and a bit rough. Please keep in mind, parents, students, teachers and supervisors, that I have not yet been to this school, thusly, my comments reflect only what I have been told, not first hand experiences. (Translation: Please don't fail me, I'm just reporting.)

Today is Maureen and my five month anniversary. It feels like yesterday and five years ago at the same time. Also in the news, the college gave me cookies and ice cream for free today. I didn't have to buy or skip lunch today! Thank you college. Now stop giving me parking tickets.

A Letter from the Internetless

2005-08-30T13:37:00.000-04:00

I am presently in the computer lab at my school, having completed today's orientation for student teaching. I have moved into my new apartment which does not have cable or internet, and will not until September 9th. I know what you're thinking, so don't worry... I'm going to watch the last episode of Stella at Mo's tonight.

Sorry for the lack of length, just wanted to update you before I went off to do more work.

I love all of you,
Ramsey

People take pictures of each other

2005-08-23T21:15:00.000-04:00

Photos from a final weekend in NYC before school!

Musical.

2005-08-15T08:17:00.000-04:00

WHAT?!

That Coffee Itch

2005-08-11T11:03:00.000-04:00

I went to Starbucks the other day with Mo, and while I was there, an interesting blog entry occurred.

As we got out of my car, a man was exiting the drive through. With his window down, and his own drink in hand, he yelled at us: "I'll have a mocha-frap-a-lapa!" and sped away. Uncertain what this meant, Maureen and I slowly walked into Starbucks, confused.

The first thing it is important to note is that Maureen and I do not own the Starbucks we were entering, so it was really impossible for us to provide him with the drink he requested of us. If he intended for us to order it for him, it was rude of him to leave without giving us money, or a way to get it to him.
I have inquired with Google as to if this item appears on the menu or if maybe there was yet another way to order it. Fruitless.
Unfortunately this mystery drink will have to remain un-enjoyed by this strange, yelling man, but on the plus side, I got a rainbow cookie.

It's funny because it's true.

2005-08-08T09:26:00.000-04:00

I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee.

2005-08-05T14:40:00.000-04:00

I was driving home with my hand out the window, holding the top of the door frame. I do this everyday, unless it is too sweltering and I have to leave the window up so I can have the air conditioner on, or if someone else is riding with me, so that I can talk to them without shouting over the rushing air in my left ear.
This has always been a positive action, the only potentially negative experience occurred two years ago when a semi driving in the opposite direction drove past me, throwing a small piece of gravel through my window at me. If hadn't been wearing glasses, which I always do, it would've hit me right in the eye. Bad.
Today while driving home I had my hand out the window, as described in an earlier paragraph, when I was struck by something in the hand. That's fine, that happens here and there, when all of a sudden, as I look down to see if whatever I was hit by made it inside the car, I see a bumblebee, struggling to reorient itself. My first reaction was "I don't think I've ever seen a bumblebee before. It's always wasps." and then "Jesus Christ, this thing is probably angry and it has a stinger! It is going to sting me!" That is when I started to swerve and arch my left buttock off the seat, in an effort to distance myself from the harpoon with wings.
I quickly pulled the car into someone's driveway and jumped out of the car, "Space Oddity" by David Bowie still blaring from my iPod. I did everything I could to get that bee out of my car, including trying to get it angry at a pencil so it would latch on and exit, which it did eventually do.
And this is the part of the story when I have no idea how to end it.

Images uploaded and tagged.

2005-08-05T08:52:00.000-04:00

Okay, as promised, I have some shots from last weekend for you on flickr.

Come on, you have to go now.

Look what I found! 4

2005-08-05T08:40:00.000-04:00

Wanna know what happens when a Star Wars bootleg is translated into Chinese and then back into English?

Hilarity. That is what happens.

Look what I found! 3

2005-08-04T09:45:00.000-04:00

Oh, goodness, a blog about the New Yorker magazine. So much nerdiness when I should be studying for my final when I should be working at the computer lab.

Update.

2005-08-03T10:10:00.000-04:00

Hello, all. I meant to update sooner but essays on Freud, final exam study guides, new episodes of Stella, time makes fools of us all.

This weekend I visited Maureen once again. We went to Ithica and her friend Laurence's 21st birthday party.

This is where I will put the photos when I upload them when I am not at work or class or hungry.

Confession.

2005-07-28T14:24:00.000-04:00

I am sitting in the Student Records office, on an iMac, listening to Belle and Sebastian on my iPod while reading a humor piece in my New Yorker by the coauthor of The Life Aquatic (who I identified as such without looking him up.).

I am one Starbucks coffee away from dying of hipster overdose.

Mu Mo and Me (and others)

2005-07-26T18:18:00.000-04:00

Mo, Vince Tom and I (plus two new castmembers, Christina and Colleen) went up to Buffalo to see Mu, an electronica, dancy, crazycrazy lady. It was a lot of fun, and we even got to meet her briefly!

Here are the two of us together:

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so - Good Lord, that's a terrible segue into my flickr account. Just click here and keep hitting next. It'll be much easier on both of us.

I hate to spoil the ending, but I need to share this: our friend Vince made his way on to the stage with the singing sensation:

That, my children, is called cannibalism.

2005-07-24T20:03:00.000-04:00

The evening last I saw Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolat Factory. I really enjoy the work of Mr. Tim Burton and this was one of his best in quite a while.

What was missing? The Gene Wilder version featured only one song that took it's lyrics from the book. This song was the insanely creepy riverboat song, and I am linking to it here so you can all enjoy it/remember how out of place it was. Link!

The New Yorker recently did a great article on the book's author Roald Dahl, that wacky anti-semite. Well worth your time. Link!

Doing my duty.

2005-07-20T10:13:00.000-04:00

President Bush announced Roberts as his nominee for Supreme Court judge. I haven't heard too many people talking much about his stance on a lot of positions, so here's a look:

Hates on animals - Wants to limit Endangered Species Act.
Hates voting for things - Wants to make Congress stop caring about parts of the Voting Rights Act
Love that Jesus, and so must you - He's down with schools forcing religious speech on public discussion.
Hates treating people fairly - Geneva Conventions isn't for all the prisoners. Just some.
Tippin' the scales - Roe v. Wade = no good.
Hypocracy - Has been known to eat babies. We can't kill them but he can?
Never Graduated Law School - I checked through two different college websites and on neither of their front pages did they mention that Roberts graduated from their school. I can only assume that this would be true of all college websites, including ones that he actually attended. Through modus tollens we can infer that Roberts never graduated and MAY HAVE NEVER BEEN TO SCHOOL.

And the first five of those aren't even made up! Now you know the facts and some things that are not facts. I am pleased to be of service.

Scotty Dies.

2005-07-20T08:23:00.000-04:00

I'm not a huge Star Trek fan, I definately wouldn't consider myself a Trekkie, and I would barely use the word "fan," to be honest, but I do enjoy the Original Series, if only for Shatner. Rubber monster suits and really cheesy acting help as well.
Well, early this morning James Doohan, Scotty died, and as you can imagine, there are a lot of obituaries that use some derrivitave of the phrase "Beam me up, Scotty" in them (my personal favorite of the ones I've seen: Beloved Scotty is Beamed All the Way Up). I remember when DeForest Kelley, Bones, died wishing that somebody would use his catch phrase from the show in an obituary. I think the best title would be: I'm Dead, Jim.
So what will the other Star Trek obituaries read as when the time comes? Nimoy's is probably going to be something like:

Actor Leonard Nimoy Lived Long and Prospered

...though I wish it would turn out to be something like "Nerds Begin Search for Spock." The others actors aren't as obvious. Here are some attempts that no one but myself will find funny:
Nichelle Nichols: Lt. Cmdr. Uhura Hailed by the Great Beyond
George Takei: Star Trek's First, Last Legitimate Actor Dies
Walter Koenig: Guy Who Played Chekov Dies, No One Cares
and finally:
William Shatner: KHHHAAAAAANNNN! or
Shatner Dies, Survived by Hairpiece

Not funny.

Sex Alert: "Ella, my mallet relaxes!"

2005-07-19T13:07:00.000-04:00

I don't know why but I like palindromes, phrases that are spelled the same way backwards and forwards. It's such a fun, nerdy, English-majory thing to like. To prove I'm not lying, here is my favorite palindrome:

Egad, a base tone denotes a bad age.

But do you know what I like more than palindromes? Jokes about 'em.

How I Spent a Piece of My Summer Vacation

2005-07-18T18:22:00.000-04:00

Last weekend I went to the Siren Festival along with regular castmember Mo and friends Vince and Lou. (I apologize to all those who have already read Mo's recap of this trip as it'll be much the same, except more hastily composed.)

We started a fancy French restaurant which turned out to be not so fancy once we saw their "garden area."

I bought new shoes. (They're a lighter shade of red than my last pair.)

Here's what the actual stage looked like, with a VHS or Beta performing for added measure.

And here are the Mates of State, one of the best bands ever, doin' their thang.

And if that's not enough, there's even more images over at my Flickr account. It was a most excellent weekend. I had a great time in my favorite city, watching one of my favorite bands, with my favorite person. How was your weekend?

More than meets the eye.

2005-07-18T08:20:00.000-04:00

From Sparknotes' commentary on Rousseau's The Social Contract:

"Fans of the Transformers may recall the "Constructicons," a group of smaller robots who could join together to form one, large robot: one Constructicon would be the left arm of this larger robot, another would be the right leg, and so on. This is the same sort of principle that Rousseau is applying here."

I am going to fail for using this as a replacement for actually reading the book and deserve nothing less.

(Larger update on my weekend (with photos!) when I get home from work. Until then, enjoy ElectronoMo's coverage of the event.)

LiveBlogging: Ramsey in Binghamton

2005-07-15T23:32:00.000-04:00

I am in Binghamton.

The Trouble With Harry

2005-07-15T14:08:00.000-04:00

I have nothing to say about Harry Potter, or the Hitchcock film named above, I just wanted to beat all the Christian protest websites/New York Times headlines/other concerning whatever sort of flack may arise from the new book.

The Whiner's Bio

2005-07-15T08:47:00.000-04:00

I spent all last weekend laboring over six pages of an essay I had to write. So why did it take me half an hour to write one third of that when I realized I forgot a major chunk of it? Because my brain hates me, that's why.
I am now reading CollegeHumor.com even less after this.
I'm spending this weekend in Binghamton with Mo, where I will see one of my favorite bands of all time The Mates of State. And in addition to that, Spoon and Q and Not U, other bands I like as well. They don't get hyperlinked like The Mates of State, though.
I just couldn't justify a post with a mere three bullets.

(Edit at 9:30am: Also, this.)

one zero zero zero zero zero zero

2005-07-14T17:42:00.000-04:00

I know, I know. More than one update on the same day, what do I think I am, Google News? (LOLOLOL!!!!) Seriously though, I'm checking in again to share with you the greatest music video ever.

It is for OK Go's "A Million Ways."

Check it, totally, out.

What a rotten application of one's self.

2005-07-14T09:34:00.000-04:00

I am a computer user. I have been a computer user for a great many years and have collected literally tens of files that I would be upset if I lost. Just last night I noticed that I somehow picked up a virus and spent the next seven hours fighting with it to no avail.

When I get home I have made plans to un-and-reinstall Symantec Antivirus with the Internet disconnected, and if that doesn't do the trick. I will. Reformat.

I should be able to back things up, but that's still depressing. Reformating is like admitting you're a bad parent. Yeah, I could've kept the computer free of viruses, but I was too busy reading snarky music reviews on Pitchfork and telling some guy at MIT why Fantastic Four wasn't that bad. Now I guess I'll just kind of, you know, hit the reset switch. I'm declaring bankruptcy on my computer.

M.C. Hammer declares bankruptcy, I don't.

But I'm going to save as much as I can/need. My archive of cancelled comedy shows and funnygiggle cartoons will hopefully live on to entertain generations of illegitimate children.

I'm Hamster Happy!

2005-07-12T20:25:00.000-04:00

Hey, people. I drew a comic strip over the span of four months. It is now on the Internet. There are more of them around the website I will now link you to:

www.BeatnikSquad.com